– By Geetha T G
Singer Yesudas added himself to the bastion of moral police by commenting on the clothes a woman chooses to wear. This was while inaugurating a cleanliness drive at a college in Thiruvananthapuram . The relevance of his comment to the occasion escapes me. Maybe because it was a women’s college, he took it upon himself to teach ‘em young ladies a thing or two about modesty. Quoting from a report of his speech: “What should be covered must be covered. Our culture involves the beauty which should be covered. Women should not trouble others by wearing jeans. When they put on jeans, men are tempted to look beyond that (jeans),” he said. “Women’s beauty lies in their modesty. They should not try to become like men. They should not force others to do unnecessary things by wearing jeans, which would give them magnetism,”
“What should be covered must be covered”
Image Source: Kolly talk
There is so much that is wrong with his comment and I feel awkward to give it importance even if only to dissect it. But how much and for how long can one ignore the barrage of moral policing instructions? Once in a while you need to vent out if you hope to stay sane. A friend queried why I had to apologize to rant. Well, I have been told far too many times to ignore, to take it easy, not to be too serious and so on. Anyway, on with it.
What should be covered must be covered.
Who decides that? And, pray, what does covered mean? A jeans does cover the ‘frightening parts’ of a woman’s body. But maybe he meant covered with a loose package and not neatly and tightly wrapped.
Our culture involves the beauty which should be covered.
Beats me. Our culture seems to involve so many random things and everyone seems to have an opinion on what it involves.
Women should not trouble others by wearing jeans.
‘Trouble?’ Really! In what way are ‘others’ troubled by a woman wearing jeans? And if they are troubled how is it the woman’s responsibility?
When they put on jeans, men are tempted to look beyond that (jeans)
Then why on earth don’t you tell the men not to be ‘tempted’ and ‘look beyond that,’ whatever that may mean. Why is the behavior of the men normalized and the woman expected to change her behavior? How long will this patriarchal nonsense go on?
Women’s beauty lies in their modesty. They should not try to become like men.
I say ‘Bah!’
They should not force others to do unnecessary things by wearing jeans,
The key words here are ‘force’ and ‘unnecessary things.’ Force, as in? No, I am not letting my imagination run haywire. Unnecessary things, I take it, are euphemism for sexual harassment, rape and so on. Can I restate the sentence like this: Women force men to rape them by wearing jeans. Is this what he meant?
which would give them magnetism.
Ha ha! (Sometimes you have to laugh, otherwise you will cry.) I am not even saying bah to this.
The motif that men are helpless creatures and that women make them commit ‘mistakes’ and thereby women are responsible for all the blighted things heaped on them is the basis for the victim blaming culture. Women have been given all sorts of weird instructions by all and sundry – don’t eat chow mein, don’t wear jeans, don’t use cell phones, don’t go out in the night, don’t go anywhere, don’t talk to men, don’t laugh, don’t resist rape, address your rapist as brother. Quoting from this article:
Once you learn to identify this pattern of victim-blaming, you will notice it time and again. The recent statements by high-ranking Indian police officials attributing rape to the clothes women wear, for example, focused on what women wear, implicitly putting the burden of change on them. And the spotlight – the media storm that followed – focused on this issue, not the men who are doing the raping.
Another trope that is often seen in victim-blaming is what one might call the helplessness of the perpetrator. While the spotlight is on the victim most of the time, it is shone on the perpetrator for an all too brief moment either to commiserate with or to bemoan the helplessness of the perpetrator, who is cut some slack, as if to say, “What else could you expect, in the light of such behavior by the victim?” The crime is cast as a natural reaction, even Greek tragedy. And thus the seam between the perpetrator and victim dissolves, and their roles become equivalent in the eyes of society.
The responses to Yesudas’ speech are another matter altogether. On the one hand are those who apologize for him with meaningless statements about him being a singing legend (so?) and that it should be taken as an elderly advice to a young generation (Hell no!). However those that presume to oppose his comments are no less problematic. I list a few below :
Bindu Krishna, President of Mahila Congress, condemns it as a shocking statement from such a famous singer who is also a senior citizen and grandfather. “….. Even his daughters-in-law are wearing it…..,” she says.
Why are they obsessed about what women of other families wear?
Do they pay for their clothes?
Why can’t he control the women in his family? Hypocrite.
Even saree can be worn in a revealing manner
The best dress for females of all ages, I think, is Salwar Khameez. Period.
a beautiful cake, displayed in the bakery, shouldn’t let u steal it or grab it illegally!! thats where ur education comes to effect…
Actually girls conceal by wearing tops..
You should appreciate women for motherhood – don’t talk ill of them
Suffice to say that all of the above too fall well within the dashed patriarchal norms. Pointing out that Yesudas did not ‘control’ what the women in his family wear is not supporting the cause of women. Similarly discussing the merits and demerits of various clothes and pronouncing sagely one dress as best for ‘females of all ages’ is no less demeaning to the women. It is equally sick to compare her to a cake as it is to glorify motherhood ad nauseum.
Fundamentalists of the world unite! And take it upon yourselves the authority to tell women what to wear, where to go, when to go, what to eat, what to talk, with whom to talk.
If only it would occur to you to tell the men not to rape, to tell them that a man does not have any right to transgress the rights of a woman. If only our society realizes that the simple and sure way to stop crimes against women is by bringing up boys with responsibility, by dinning into them the concept of consent and not excuse their criminal behavior by saying boys will be boys. If only…
Image source: Nirmukta
The author can be contacted at equalgenderpro@gmail.com. Please contact us if you are interested in organizing Gender sensitization programmes in schools/colleges and workplaces.
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